“Monttyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!”
This was
the auspicious starting line of every kitty party hosted by Bobby Chopra at her
sprawling gaudy farmhouse for her “kareebi”
friends.
Kulpreet
Kaur looked appreciatively at Jaspreet Kapoor who then smiled at Pinky Singh
who signalled to Dolly Bhatia to begin. These subtle signals being transferred,
Dolly turned towards Bobby and spoke,
“Bobby ji, what is all this? Just last week you
threw a cocktail party and now apni
kitty so jaldi? You are really
pampering us.”
Bobby
effused a heavy artificial sigh and lamented, “Now what to do ji, ever since Sunny puttar left for Amriika yesterday by
Canadian Airlines Business Class, I have been soooooo depressed ji.”
Jaspreet
shook her head, her chunky earrings wobbling maddeningly, “Same here ji…… Kukkoo puttar left last week only, Cathay Pacific First Class….how much I
cried ji.”
The
conspicuous silence clearly indicated that Jaspreet had scored the first goal
today. Before anyone could challenge her comment, Monty came laden with a
silver plate carrying five Pina Coladas dressed with a sprig of mint, a slice
of lemon and a dainty umbrella adorning each glass. Monty was Bobby’s husband’s
Man-Friday, whose portfolio amongst several other essentials also included organising
Bobby’s parties and ensuring that her kitties became the talk of the town for
at least two weeks after they were held.
“Welcome
drinks for you all ji”, said Bobby,
exerting herself to personally hand over all the ladies their drinks,
remembering to accidently spill some on Jaspreet’s white dupatta.
“How are
you Monty ji?” said Pinky, sipping
her drink noisily.
“At your
service always ji”, said Monty
smiling humbly. He was a very calm and stoic personality and this quality
served as an invaluable asset to him when Bobby suddenly decided to declare a “zabardassst” kitty party. After the
first few sessions, he had started to rather enjoy these kitties. He had
figured out that all the womens’ sons studied in the same university abroad and
there had always been a simmering competition amongst the ladies regarding the
two most important things in their lives- their sons and their social status.
However, this kitty was different.
Though Bobby
was loudly announcing various excuses for holding the get-together, he knew the
real reason which Bobby had been bursting to divulge since quite some time, and
now, the time had finally come and she was going to let the cat out of the bag
in style.
“Vaise……..Sunny has finally got over that
74 block waali Pam’s daughter Sweety.”
Four pairs
of eyes were immediately fixed on her. Each lady was trying to sense where the
conversation was heading. The gravity of the situation could be only understood
by the fact that none of the ladies even realised when Monty placed sizzling paneer tikkas on skewers before them.
“And what
made him get over Miss Chandigarh, Bobby ji?”
asked Kulpreet curiously.
Dolly gave
a catty laugh and said, “The krrect
question is WHO made him get over her ji!”
Bobby
smiled indulgently and said, “I am happy to announce that very soon, I might be getting an NRI bahu .”
Many
exclamations, insincere congratulations, and heavily saccharine praises
followed this proclamation as Monty tried to maintain a straight face.
Considerably satisfied with her audience’s reaction Bobby continued,
“Very
pretty girl, though I haven’t seen her…….. Punjabi, from a good family and
Sunny tells me she is an excellent dancer.”
Dolly
couldn’t take this anymore and to prevent her feelings from giving way, she
stuffed a hot tikki into her mouth.
Bobby had clearly scored at least five points by dropping this bomb and there
was no way Kulpreet was going to leave this challenge unaccepted.
“Even my
Rocky has found a girl ji…..I have
even seen her photo….very tall, slim fair, and university topper”, she said
smiling slyly at her friends.”
Pinky commented
seethingly,
“How did university topper fall for Rocky??I
heard he was borderline pass last semester.”
“Even I
have been hearing a lot of things about your Goggy, Pinky ji. Isse pehle ki I tell you request him only to convey his aktvitees to you.”
“Then you must
have also heard that Goggy will be proposing a varrrrry beautiful girl in
his university……and there is no chance she can refuse him.”
Now assured
that her kitty had earned enough publicity, Bobby beckoned to Monty and
whispered in his ear,
“Atmosphere
is becoming thoda hot ji….just arrange for those Sharma waale Ras Malai with extra Malai.”
Meanwhile,
Jaspreet, bored with the Rocky v/s Goggy face off, steered the conversation in
another direction,
“Toh when is the shaadi Bobby ji?”
“Actually,
Sunny hasn’t proposed to her yet…..he wants to do it in khaandaani style you know…..he will be gifting her a six carat
Solitaire.”
“Goggy has
toh already planned to gift one of our seven bungalows……..you know Palanpur waala.”
Kulpreet
between mouthfuls of tikki, said,”Arre my Lucky doesn’t need to bother
about these gifts ji……..aaj kal he has
started building his boddy shoddy….and
he was toh pehle se hi good looking….remember Miss Chandigarh had chosen him only
to carry her Gucci waali bag up to
her car ji.”
“Mere
Sunny’s Mauritius photo toh has got
324 likes on Facebook”, said Bobby.
Dolly
leaned casually towards Jaspreet and whispered,”Usme se 100 likes toh
Bobby must have collected maang maang ke
ji, warna woh Sunny…….”, and both the ladies shared a private joke at their
host’s expense.
Monty
chuckled to himself in the kitchen as he carefully arranged the crystal dessert
bowls on the platter. Just as he was transferring the tray on his trolley, his
mobile phone rang. A fond smile creased oh his wrinkled face as he answered it,
”Simran!!!!
How are you beta?”
“Enjoying
thoroughly Daddy Ji.”
“You are
concentrating on studies na? Itna vadda
loan leke bheja hai USA tujhe!!”
“Arre Daddy
ji, I am concentrating on studies and boys are concentrating on me.”
“Kaun hai ye kaminey?”
“Aapke kitty
mummies ke hotties!!.”
Monty burst
out laughing at the irony of the situation. With tears of laughter flowing down
his cheeks, he told the apple of his eye,
“Toh what are you choosing? The six carat
Solitaire, Palanpur Bungalow, or body
builder?””
“I’m
choosing a man whose heart shines brighter than the six carat Solitaire, whose
1-BHK flat is warmer than the Palanpur Bungalow, he’s more into brain building
than body building. He is doing Ph.D here…..my senior….. his father works in
LIC….you will love him!!! My choice is priceless.”
Chuckling, Monty said, ”Your choice is definitely expensive beta…..so many planned shaadis are going to be cancelled
because of it!! But I’m happy…..I’m sure I’ll like him.”
Monty had
just hung up when a shrill voice came racing into the kitchen,
“Monttttyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!”
Monty
smiled to himself and sighed, “Life does go on…”
Slowly pushing the food laden
trolley, Monty proceeded into the lounge to provide dessert to the ladies
before they were served their just desserts by his daughter.
